Tag: children love

Why You Shouldn’t Love Everyone

The idea that we need to love everyone is faulty.

We suffer from trying to co-exist with people who don’t actually love us, but we believe we are faulty in that because we grew up in environments that did not resonate with who we were.

But we can still find our home with those like us.

We don’t have to love everyone (and they don’t have to love us).

We get obsessed about not being accepted because we’ve gotten the message that we need to fit into the world. Otherwise we’ll supposedly be entirely cast out, alone.

But “the world” is not that limited energetic space you’ve grown up in; it’s not the mental moral creation with its specific boundaries and demands that your family/culture had in their heads.

So, in expecting and allowing yourself to dislike others and be disliked by others, you are freeing the space for the people who like you for who you are.

All judgment of others is self-definition. It simply says “I am not like you”.

Judgment is natural and essential. It only becomes an attack when we feel forced to remain locked to that original home-environment (or one that resembles it) that is not tolerant of us, so we go into a fight against them to survive as  ourselves instead of being sucked into their kind of being.

But if we disallow being disliked and disliking, we keep asking for approval from these same (type of) people who already don’t see us as approvable while they too are locked in a battle to safeguard their identity.

So, whenever other people don’t want you, allow that, because they are actually relieving you from trying to be approved by someone who does not resonate with you enough, so they would in essence have to reject themselves in order to approve of you.

And what about the spiritual concept of loving everyone?

Well, even that only comes when we are not needing approval from them/clashing with their ideals, so usually, it comes from a place of distance and as a generalised soul-feeling as opposed to the basis of real, bonded, secure relationships with these people.

Because whenever we are too close (in an setting where we are asking for love) being disliked is a huge blow to our self-esteem and requires huge energy to battle.

So, sure, allow love for everyone but first take care of whether you are being loved by finding your true home-environments in the people that NATURALLY care to love you.

Those are the people who are already enough like you and loving you increases their self-love too.

The people who reject you in any way do not resonate with you (at least at that time) and they are rejecting what they do not want to be or what they do want but feel disallowed to be.

In either case, you do not have to force yourself to “love” and adjust to their energies-this is a mirror of the powerlessness that you experienced in childhood where your only option was to adapt to what your parent(s) demanded of you (justifying it as you being “loving” towards them).

Children love their parents automatically.

It is never the child’s love that is faulty and always the parent’s perception that could benefit from the child’s pure reflection of where their actual love has been compromised.

So, let people dislike you and let them be far from you since the jarring nature of your togetherness hurts you (both).

Do not seek those people; unless you want to be more like them because something in you is attracted to their qualities (different from seeking approval by contorting yourself to match what you think you should be).

We are all meant to be different and we are never too different to have a home-environment of love.

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